Not the best effort

Today I got ready to run my 18 miles, with the intention of trying the run/walk approach. I decided on 30 minutes run and 2 minutes walk.
I looked out of the window and was instantly uninspired to run. There was very fine but relatively heavy "drizzle" and I have to admit just not feeling in the mood. Ever since I incorporated big midweek runs, I find I'm still tired (to a certain degree) by Saturday. Unfortunately this is a necessary evil on the road towards ultras, and hopefully one day I will just learn to cope with it.
It didn't help matters that today Graeme got his official notice of being layed off at work. They have advised it could be as early as the 7th of March... he seems to think it will be a month later. I hope he's right!
So, despite my negativity I went out. I ran the first mile around Blackhall as it the flattest part near me before the undulations start, and by the time I got to around 30 minutes I seemed to settle into it ok. There was even a flicker of enjoyment for all of about 5 minutes, before the really heavy rain started and I ended up with one soaked through foot as I tried in vain to dodge really deep water trenches on the route. By 6 miles I really did have a face like shite as I contemplated turning around and giving it up as a bad job.
I ended up just plodding on, and the next few miles went past uneventfully. I stuck quite rigidly to the timings for the walk breaks until I got to around 12-14 miles where I seemed to struggle quite a bit and walked up every slight incline.
I told myself off for being so lazy and promised myself I would only walk up 2 hills on the way back. I stuck to that, apart from the very last 1/4 of a mile home which was walked. God, I was really knackered! You can tell I haven't done this long a run for a couple of months!
So, I now have my skins on (for recovery), something I haven't had to do for months. I'm not too bad considering though.
I'm off to a spiritualist church tomorrow night. I have started hearing/seeing things again. My mam thinks it's because I went to see a medium last week and it's sorta opened the door on it all again. Maybe it has... I dunno!